TEASING, MEANNESS, BULLYING, & HARASSMENT

The Del Mar Middle School staff is dedicated to creating an environment of mutual respect where all students feel safe. Students are expected to refrain from making any comment or gesture that is harmful or offensive to others.  

There are often three people or parties involved in teasing or bullying situations:

1. Provoker: the person who is hurtful to another

2. Subject: the person on the receiving end

3. Bystander: the person who witnesses and observes

Any student on the receiving end of an unwanted remark should ask, then tell the other person to stop and seek adult help if needed.  Students who witness any such event should speak up and advocate for their peers to ensure others’ well-being and safety. There is no such thing as an innocent bystander—if you see something, say something.  Those who experience or witness someone being teased or bullied should tell the provoker to stop or report to an adult. Asking for help or reporting an incident is NOT snitching—it is a way to protect others’ rights to be safe at school.

Bullying, distinct from other incidents of teasing, is defined as deliberately hurtful behavior repeated over a period of time. There are four types of bullying:

1. Physical

2. Verbal: name-calling, teasing, threatening

3. Relational: spreading rumors, excluding people from groups

4. Cyber: saying hurtful, offensive things about others online

If bullying should occur: The subject, and/or bystanders should report the bullying incident and ask peers or adults for help.  Refer to the RUSD Bully Policy for more information.

ANTI-BULLYING PROTOCOLS

Our school’s social vision and values

Our school, collectively, will provide our children with extraordinary opportunities to enlighten their minds, inspire their hearts, and strengthen their resolve to positively impact their world. Through their efforts and with the support of the whole school community, our students will become:

• Motivated Learners Committed to Academic Excellence

  • Demonstrate responsibility, self-direction, and independence

  • Take risks, are not afraid to make mistakes, and learn from them

  • Take pride in accomplishments

  • Understand learning is a lifelong process

• Create Problem Solvers

  • Apply critical thinking

  • Integrate curiosity, imagination, and insight

  • Apply knowledge across disciplines, projects, and real-life situations

  • Generate ideas and the best possible solutions

• Effective Communicators

  • Actively listen and acknowledge different points of view and cultural contexts

  • Express and support positions considering multiple perspectives

  • Use appropriate tools and language to inform, persuade, and convey ideas to diverse audiences

  • Collaborate with others

• Engaged Citizens

  • Demonstrate empathy, ethical behavior, and respect for self, others, and the environment

  • Actively contribute to school, local, and global communities

  • Advocate for self and others

  • Understand and appreciate cultures, histories, and contributions of people of the world

• Balanced Individuals/Best Self

  • Demonstrate self-knowledge, integrity, good judgment, and honor

  • Exhibit self-assurance, confidence, and social competence

  • Persevere and are resilient amidst adversity, stress, disappointment, and conflict

  • Make positive choices for personal and physical well being

  • Believe in the power of the individual to make a difference

Our Inclusion Statement

We embrace an intentional culture that champions everyone’s full participation as their authentic selves in all of the opportunities that comprise the Del Mar experience. This includes supporting each community member’s understanding of their own identities and acceptance of the identities of others. By doing so, we empower everyone at Del Mar to connect, learn, grow, and achieve.

The inclusive culture we strive for requires us to make both institutional and individual commitments. Institutionally, we will align policies, curriculum, and decision-making to this goal, and we commit to ongoing self-examination, learning, and action. We also encourage and support individuals to initiate and engage in candid, courageous conversations as this work is the responsibility of every member of our community.

We are committed to creating and sustaining an inclusive, equitable, and respectful environment in which each person has a sense of belonging and is provided the support to thrive.

Our community believes that valuing visible and invisible diversity is essential for an inclusive teaching and learning environment that fosters educational excellence for all.

Why we implemented a schoolwide system to stop bullying

Bullying and harassment stand in the way of our social vision and values. Therefore, our school has adopted the No Bully Program for preventing and responding to harassment and bullying on district property; at district or school-sanctioned activities and events; through social media or any other electronic communication; when students are being transported in any vehicle dispatched by the one of its schools; or off school property when such conduct has a nexus to school or any curricular or non-curricular activity or event. This schoolwide system applies to all students, teachers, staff, specialists, and anyone who works on our campus, whether employed by the school or district, working as contractors, or volunteers pursuant to Reed Union School District and School Board policies: (BP) and Administrative Regulations (AR): BP 5137 Positive School Climate BP 5131 Conduct BP 5030 Student Wellness BP/AR 1312.3 Uniform Complaint Procedures AR 0450 Comprehensive Safety Plan AR 0440 District Technology Plan BP/AR 5139 Bullying AR 5144.1 Suspension and Expulsion/Due Process.

What is bullying?

Bullying occurs when a student, or group of students, repeatedly tries to hurt, humiliate, or get power over another student in any of the following ways.

• Physical bullying is when a student uses physical force to hurt another student, e.g., by hitting, pushing, shoving, kicking, taking a student’s belongings, or stealing their money.

• Verbal bullying is when a student uses words, images, or gestures to intimidate or humiliate another student, e.g., by taunting, name-calling, teasing, put-downs, insults, threats, and blackmail.

• Relational bullying is when a student excludes or isolates another student, e.g., by leaving them out, manipulating others against them, or spreading false rumors or gossip.

• Cyberbullying is when a student uses their cell phone, text messages, e-mails, instant messaging, the Internet, or social media to threaten, shame, or isolate another student.  It includes breaking into a student’s online account and assuming that student’s identity in order to damage their reputation.

Bullying is different from conflict.  Conflict is an inevitable part of life and can occur at school when a student perceives another student as being an obstacle to what they want or value. If students are in conflict but are not bullying, our school is committed to helping students talk it through.

Bullying may, at times, amount to harassment.  It is harassment to target a student online or face to face because of his or her academic performance or any basis protected by federal and state law, including disability, race, creed, color, sex, sexual orientation, national origin, religion, ancestry, or the need for special education services, whether such characteristic(s) is actual or perceived.

It is sexual harassment to target a student with unwanted sexual comments, gestures, physical contact, demands for sexual involvement accompanied by threats concerning their grades causing the student to feel uncomfortable or unsafe at school, or that interferes with schoolwork.  In these situations, complaints will be investigated according to the school’s sexual harassment policy.

Our school does not tolerate bullying or harassment for any reason.  It is a serious breach of the school rules if a student takes revenge or asks someone to threaten or hurt a student that has reported bullying or harassment. 

How students can end bullying

 Bullying and harassment cause pain and stress to students and are never justified or excusable as “just teasing” or “just playing.”  When a student stands by doing nothing or laughs or posts comments online when others bully, they are participating in bullying.

The students at Del Mar Middle School have agreed to join to treat others with respect both online and face-to-face so that we keep our campus bully-free. 

All students agree to:

• Value student differences and treat others with respect both online and face-to-face.

• Tell bullying students to STOP by saying, “You are bullying. Stop. At Del Mar, we treat everyone with respect and kindness” when I or others around me are the target of bullying.  

• Walk away and seek help by telling a trusted adult wherever it happens or placing a note in the Dragon box outside the main office if I cannot safely stop the bullying.

• Never take revenge or ask someone to hurt a student that has reported bullying. 

Our school takes a problem-solving approach to bullying. We have staff members trained as Solution Coaches who will meet with students that are the target of bullying and help end bullying situations. 

Staff, Faculty, and Families Response to Student Harassment and Bullying

Our school follows the No Bully Program to prevent and respond to bullying and harassment.

Level 1: We support an inclusive school where everyone is accepted for who they are.

We recognize that our school contains different abilities, body sizes, races, religions, socio-economic statuses, gender identities, and sexual orientations.  All teachers, staff, students, parents, and volunteers support our social vision: We champion a school culture where everyone knows they belong ( e.g. We treat one another with compassion, integrity, and respect).

• Our school has created a No Bully Team on preventing bullying at this school and to ensure that students receive the relevant education for this to happen.  Our team meets at least once a month and comprises a school administrator and a diverse range of staff members.

• Our school has developed an active partnership with parents and community members to help maintain a school environment free from aggression and violence.

• Students learn through our social and emotional curriculum to get smart in managing their emotions and their relationships and to stand up to bullying at our school.

• Each year we administer a survey to students asking about their perception of the frequency and intensity of bullying at our schools.

Level 2: We watch out for bullying and refer targets to a Solution Coach.

• Teachers and school staff have been trained to watch out for students who appear to be isolated from other students, who are put down by others behind their backs, or who show signs of being bullied.

• If any teacher or staff member sees any student aggression or disrespect, they shall take immediate steps to intervene and redirect the student. Steps may include the following:

  • Name the behavior for what it is, e.g., “That sounded like a putdown.”

  •  Speak to the possible impact behind the words or gestures, e.g., “That was meant to hurt.”

Remind students of our school’s social vision and how their behavior is not aligned with this: We treat one another with compassion, integrity, and respect.

• Notify the school administration immediately if there are any concerns for a student’s physical safety.

• If any member of staff learns or suspects that a student is the target of continued bullying, they shall check in with the student as soon as reasonably possible.  If this appears to be ongoing bullying or harassment, they should report the bullying through text or email to the Solution Coach within 24 hours.

• If a parent or guardian knows or suspects that their child is being harassed or bullied, we encourage your student to ask the bullying students to stop or to seek help from their classroom teacher.  If this does not solve the situation, please report the bullying to the school administration. The school can only help you if you reach out and tell us what is happening. 

• If a student is the target of cyberbullying, please take screenshots and/or print any electronic or digital messages and share these with the school.

Level 3: Solution Team: Solving the Bullying, Progressive Discipline, and Other Responses.

• The Solution Coach investigates and resolves the situation and shall ensure that any report of bullying or harassment and its progress and resolution is documented in a Solution Team log and logged in ALMA (our school information systems database). This will maintain compliance with school policy.

• Our school uses a variety of methods to resolve ongoing incidents of bullying and harassment in accordance with school policy.

  • We may refer the target of bullying to get help from a school Solution Coach. Solution Coaches are teachers and staff members who have been trained to support students who are the target of bullying and to create solutions to bullying by bringing students together, including bullies, bystanders, and positive student leaders. The Solution Coach may use solution-focused discussion, redirection, skill building, and counseling and shall report progress to the Head of School.

  • We may use progressive discipline to redirect bullying students depending upon the severity of the bullying. School Administration may meet with the bullying student, notify their parent or guardian, and determine consequences to change behavior. In addition, School Administration may inform the student that disciplinary consequences can occur if the bullying continues.

Level 4: Implement a classroom or grade-wide action plan

If a pattern of harassment or prejudice is apparent across an entire class or grade, the Solution Coach brings together relevant school staff to implement a plan to teach respect for differences and create a supportive peer culture.

Timeline for a bullying report under this protocol 

Week One     

• The Assistant Principal or Principal is notified of an ongoing bullying situation.

• When appropriate, a school administrator refers the target of bullying to a school Solution Coach to receive the assistance of a student Solution Team. Parents/guardians of the target are informed. The Solution Coach will enter the incident in the Solution Team log ALMA (our school information systems database).

• The Solution Team holds its first meeting (if this process has been initiated) and logs progress in the Solution Team log.

• The Assistant Principal or Principal may engage the progressive discipline process. 

Week Two                 

• The Solution Coach follows up with the target. The Solution Team holds its second meeting (if this process has been initiated) and the Solution Coach works with students to create a solution. The Solution Coach records progress in the Solution Team log.

• Further progressive discipline when necessary.

Week Three  

• Solution Coach checks in with the target and invites them to attend the third Solution Team meeting (if this process has been initiated). The Solution Coach records progress in the Solution Team log and ALMA.

• Solution Coach notifies the Head of School and parents/guardians of the outcome.

• In some cases, there may arise the need to implement an empathy-building plan for the entire class or grade.

Three Month Follow Up

• Solution Coach schedules a three-month follow-up with the target and records progress in the Solution Team log. 

If the school’s intervention does not resolve the bullying, the student or their parent/guardian should inform the Superintendent in writing. If the student or parent/guardian disagrees with how the school has responded to a complaint of harassment or bullying, he or she may appeal by writing to the Superintendent at 277 Karen Way, Tiburon, California 94920 or by calling (415) 381-1112.

NOTE:  This further outlines the school’s existing Reed Union School District Board Policies and Administrative Regulations.